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Friday, October 6, 2006

The Contents of my bag

I was cleaning out my bag here (purse to our friends over the pond) and was amazed of what is in there, my daughters piglet sock, a clothes peg (make that two) can of diet coke, tube of cortisone cream, a print out of 'la belle dans san merci' two tubes of Ibuprofen gel, packet of cigs, 3 books of stamps, 8 letters for a writing project of mine, 2 pens, 1 concealer, aromatherpy perfume, fun size mars bar wrapper and money, two cds - The The and some unmarked copy of a disc waiting to be discovered and wait for it...... wait for it..... a bone??! I thought what the f@*k?? Where I work my boss has a salvage yard and also two dogs one a german shepard the other a timber wolf, must have been her roaming in here and dropped a bone in there..All is forgiven though on account of her having bigger and sharper teeth than I

5 comments:

Stucco said...

You know- bones are funny. I mean, being a male, I have the inner 9 year old that laughs at the word "bone" like Beavis or Butt-head, but beyond that it's still funny. The maybe one and only time Arsenio Hall was ever funny was when he caled a local franchise pizza joint (Domino's- do they exist there?) and complained to the guy who answered that he found a human bone in his pizza. Plus, I had a friend who used to deliver auto parts in a company owned truck that was used by a number of different people. One day he's out and about, and somethingis poking him in the back of the thigh- a chicken bone stuck in teh upholstery of the seat. The fellow who put it there when approached about the matter later in the day, couldn't be bothered to explain himself as he was too busy ranting about some "apple-headed motherfucker". Maybe more surreal than funny, but it still makes me laugh.

Judith said...

Apple headed mother fucker has to be one of the best put downs ever LOL!

slaghammer said...

To be given a bone by a dog is the highest honor bestowed by our fur-bearing friends. It would be similar to an acquaintance handing over a gift certificate for their favorite restaurant. Now, to be given "the" bone by a dog is more like a "how do you do.” Not that significant at all.

Judith said...

the dog recognises me as a good friend me thinks; on lunch and breaks the two of us conspire against the feral cats that also patrol the yard. We look quite the intimidating pair.

Judith said...

the dog recognises me as a good friend me thinks; on lunch and breaks the two of us conspire against the feral cats that also patrol the yard. We look quite the intimidating pair.

Stucco we have dominos here, but they dont give you a free pizza if they go over the alloted delivery times; tight bastards think compensation comes in the form of garlic cheesey bread.