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! Cant impart too much information as I would have to kill you with my bare hands

Thursday, March 30, 2006

Doing Nothing

Lately I’ve been trawling the net to send some partially anonymous letters to my family the first victim was to my father who used to be a manager on the state owned ferry company here. Now to explain briefly there was a package of voluntary redundancies there and my dad was the last in the ‘don’t be a chump take the lump’ brigade, so basically I made up a company letterhead , stated in the letter that they found a private and confidential letter addressed to him and they had forwarded it on - I wrote it in the guise of his friend Joe who starts with an eloquent resignation letter and it progresses.. Well you can read the rest yourself ..Dear Johnny
After an appropriate period of deliberation, I have come to the decision to tender my resignation from Irish Ferries, effective November 10, 2003.
Please know that I still maintain a high level of respect for you as a manager and colleague, and I thank you sincerely for the support and assistance you have offered me in each of those roles. I have been proud to work for Irish Ferries over the past eight years; it has been a journey that has provided me an unparalleled foundation to move forward to new and exciting opportunities.
As such, I have decided to become a professional pirate. It has always been a dream of mine to live the life of a swashbuckling corsair, beholden to none and master of all I survey. Once my crew of unabashed rogues is assembled, we shall take to the capacious expanse of the high seas to pursue fortune, fame, and hair-raising adventure.
Our path may not be filled with the porcine comforts and technological marvels that Irish Ferries provides, but we shall nonetheless move forward to carve a name for ourselves in the annals of bold insurgency and death-defying derring-do. Once I have a keen blade at my hip and the Jolly Roger is flapping high above me, I believe I will find my true calling.
Please note that I am currently accepting applications for First Officer, if you are at all interested in applying. I will provide a full medical and dental plan, which will offer immediate coverage of all maladies other than scurvy and the occasional bout of rickets.

Joe (Aharr)
Unlike the Neil Kurtzman novel myself doing nothing has led to a veritable devils playground via the net and although only a clutch of my nearest know about my blog site here they will not escape for be afraid be very afraid ( Ostensibly, this is a warning that something dangerous is imminent. In reality, its with comic intent. The faint hearted of you lot warned . are more likely to find it mildly unwelcome and annoying than actually dangerous)

Wednesday, March 29, 2006

Jumping like a battlestar

Its the geek in me that gives that title to this entry.. Its been so long since I posted that I dont remember too much with clarity of whats been going on and there fore this entry will look like a time jump as you might see on battlestar galactica or babylon 5 and Im in danger of giving myself the impression Im a closet trekkie which I am absolutely not but am an avid fan of the new battlestar galactica re-imagined. Id like to say Ive been caught up in writing at home but my daughters but a stop to it ever since they found some hair clips and my drive on my pc rendering it impossible to save on floppy... the only significant things that I can remember is my other half forgetting mothers day, his daughter being sent a stinging letter from me and on the day she does gets suspended from school.. On the upside Im in the mode of take no prisoners and am always glad of the impowering feeling of dont fuck with me..

Monday, March 20, 2006



Last week we found out that ryans oldest daughter had been caught stealing and also was drunk! The kid is only 12 and shes been threatening her mother and doing all sorts. Hearing about this has given me a taste for her blood because I know how manipulative she can be and altough she never tried it with me she has given me a few incidences where I have let her known that she would have to stay up all night to get one over on me. If I owned her Id dance on her mind you if she where mine It would never have got this far - shes up in court on tuesday and it seems like everything is taking a back seat until then. Ryan could be going over there unanounced to sort her out- she is trying to get over here to live as she hates her mother as she says but trust me once she is under our roof her mums is going to seem like shangri la and ours Dr Lecters house

Friday, March 3, 2006

All Flowers in time

In an attempt to shy away from all things present and prehaps being a touch nostalgic looked up some of the more obscure bands of the early 90s that I love so much, more or less from the 4AD era such as dead can dance this mortal coil and the beautiful cocteau twins with their liquid air I noticed there is a new (?) recording of All Flowers in Time with Liz Frazer and Jeff Buckley (the late) click the link for a taster http://www.cocteautwins.com/html/news.html its a wonderful tune and recommend it if you are or are not a fan of either. I get really heady with thoughts of my past especially the time leading up to and in time period of my living in the uk. I really wish I had the attitude and headful of sense I have now rather than then - its a pineful sense that I carry and in a small way I know I wouldnt be the person today if I wasnt the person then, but definately if I had a time machine I would go back to then and play the game more assertively.

Thursday, March 2, 2006

Product of the 80s

You know you were a child of the 80s when.....
You never questioned why the A-Team were always imprisoned in places that had sufficient tools to build an armoured tank.
Dungeons & Dragons was your favourite cartoon.
Your lunch times were spent perfecting swan dives and backspins.
You fell out with friends during heated arguments about the relative merits of the mission & sisters of mercy
You owned, or wanted a "Frankie says..." T-shirt.
You have ever danced (or even worse cried) to Kylie & Jason.
Cerise pink, electric blue and banana yellow have at some stage featured in your wardrobe or make-up collection.
You ever did the top toggle of your coat up around your neck without having your arms in the sleeves, and knew you looked like a super-hero.
You remember when the A-Ha video was the pinnacle of modern technology, and you can still sing all the words.
Parachuting Action man was your favourite toy.
Your best party dress was either a ra-ra or puff-ball skirt.
You ever owned a thin, black leather tie (and were proud of it), or worse it was patterned like a piano.
You wondered why a popular kids TV programme told you to "Turn off your TV set and go and do some less boring instead".
You wanted to be either Nancy Drew or the Hardy Boys.
You ever said "It's my ball, and if I can't be Kevin Keegan I'm going home!"
You remember the aerobie scare.
You have ever po-goed or space-hopped.
You remember when Keith Chegwin & Maggie Philbin were the hottest romantic couple.
You wondered why your walkie-talkie didn't have the same range as those in the Red Hand Gang.
You were shocked by the controversial plot lines in Degrassi Junior High.
You tried to set up a "Famous Five" or "Secret Seven" gang with your school friends.
You tried to convince your Dad to fit a strip of red lights on the front of his Capri so it looked like KITT.
"Ca-vey Wa-vey!" means something to you.
You ever had more than 10 sweets in a 10p mix-up.
Not only did you wear luminous clothing, but they were mismatched fingerless gloves and towelling socks.
You remember when Betamax was at the cutting edge of technology.
Conveyor belts regularly carried washing machines, deep-fat fryers and a cuddly toy.
You could have got away with it if it hadn't been for those meddling kids.
(Girls) You owned a pair of Pixie Boots, generally worn with leg warmers.
(Boys) You owned a pair of pale grey slip-ons, generally worn with white towelling socks.
Shiny grey flecked suits.
You rolled the sleeves of your suit jacket up
Ooh, you could crush a Grape!
You went to school with Pogo Patterson, Gripper Stebson, and Ro-land.
You were proud of your picture appearing in the Gallery.
You remember Look In magazine, and when it was only 20p
You wondered why you and your mates never encountered diamond thieves whilst out on your BMXs.

Your best mate had a soda stream at home and you were jealous