Czech out my feet (aka I hate bleedin cobblestones)

It’s a nice feeling to come home and be able to walk without the gait of an old rummy that looks like they’ve been shot in the arse with a pellet gun. Never and I mean Never will I go any distance travelling without a comfortable pair of walking shoes. For the past three days have been agony and Ryan being the angel that he is, showed immeasurable patience with me. Now for those unaware, there is hardly a square inch of prague that has not got a cobble stone on its streets, It was a hard lesson to learn and a bigger one for my feet, christ knows how they got there -but the blisters didn’t develop on the back of my ankles or sides of toes - no, right between where the sole of the foot and toe pad meet- to be descriptive , like walking on salty bubble wrap - coupled with the cobbles, I was either feeling really sorry for myself or going fucking mad with frustration. I tried my best to keep these feelings to myself and not let it ruin things, especially for ryan. So how was prague you ask.? Breathtaking I have to say. But strange as it seems I wouldn’t live there. Now Ryan is all set to abscond the country to live there but A it’s a beautiful city no doubt about it but the winters are so harsh and we where in the touristy part of the city B the language barrier is huge and its apparently harder to learn than Russian C We had a comfortable amount of money, no children with us and the most romantic deluxe suite possibly in prague and to be fair ryan has not travelled much so I am not surprised that he feel in love with the holiday mode side of things ..I ,on the other hand am in ‘reality mode’ and have no intentions of uprooting the girls and myself to live in a strange land.. That aside We had a marvellous time just walking around blind in the city - going up little side streets , finding a cosy pub, imbibing the very palatable beer or two and back to the warmth and cosiness of our hotel in the evening. The last night we met one of ryans friends , Asitar, who works promoting bands of the metal variety over in the Czech republic- His English was limited and I felt very patronising talking to slowly (said I talk musch fast) to him in pigeon English but we had a meeting of minds when we discovered our ever growing hatred in both our hearts for rap music and in particular 50 cent (*extremely ugly - how you say? How you say? ….Black mastiff-says Asitar and then I tell him my theory of how someone performed skull replacement surgery on 50 cent and used a big mad cow skull in the procedure - seemed to understand and appreciate my humour on the subject. ) I was particularly amused by the way Czech people have embraced the slow westernisation of their country and the way they have used pigeon English to sell some things to the tourist punter such as in advertising jewellery with the caption ‘diamond brilliantly’ and ‘you don’t be fooled 0% commision’.. The girls where asleep when we got in so about 6am this morning luci gets out of bed and stands beside me beaming and whispers ‘awhh mama’ then eibhe wakes up shes hurdled into the bed between the two of us and we smother them with kisses and head down for the holiday booty which consist of kaleidoscopes , giggling cows and pigs, shrek stuff for luci and hazelnut wafers the size of dinner plates for eibhe. Tore me in two slipping out for work and leaving them this morning… Now its back to the grind stone where a flatulent wolf sits at the door waiting for the postman to call - I get a kick out of the sadistic dance she and the postman have, he opens the door a crack and slides in the post and she acts like a rabid dog from ‘the pack ‘ and demonstrates what she would do to him one of these days by shredding the fuck out of whatever letter has fallen . it’s the highlight of my day as this job goes..